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EMOTIONAL ABSENCE

Finding My Own Loving Mother Inside

by Kristin Mitchener

I have lived a life of sadness because I didn’t have a healthy, loving mother. But, what is a mother? Mothers are all around, and simply take the voice I have within.

Running is my mother. Running pushes me, strengthens me, tells me motivating things like “You will make it” and “Look how far you’ve come.”

Writing is my mother. Writing gives me opportunities to create, to articulate, to express my truest feelings without fear of shame or ridicule.

Music is my mother. Music lets me dance until I’m dizzy, encourages me to sing at the top of my lungs until I’m out of breath and giddy from the lyrics of my favorite tunes. It never matters if I know every word or miss every key. All that matters is that I am happy in that moment.

My dog Rowdy is my mother. He greets me with open paws and a wagging tail every time I walk through the door, even if I just came in from checking the mail. He doesn’t expect me to be perfect but also doesn’t know that I’m not, and licks my cheek every chance he gets with the same loving contentment that says, “You are my angel.”

I have mothers all around me. I just have to look within myself to find them.

 

To read more from Kristin, click here.

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