Can 6 Weeks Really Make A Difference?
I felt like I was holding in a lifetime of pain, a dark valley that few understood. The touching mother-daughter moments that television portrays, and Mother’s Day exhorts have never been a part of my life. The very wound of living motherless (especially when your mom is still alive), is a deep well.
How do you know what healthy boundaries should look like?
What do you do with the intense pain and void?
Why would a mother not want to have a healthy relationship with her child?
There’s a lot of questions that surface when you’re the daughter of an emotionally absent or narcissistic mother. This is a safe place where you can ask those questions. As I did, I found genuine, healthy support.
3 Things I Didn’t Know I Needed
I wasn’t sure what to expect when I signed up for that first class. While I was trying to hide the pain, it was seeping into every area of my life and my world was crashing. I felt lost. I didn’t desire to talk about things so much as I just wanted the hurting to stop. Baked-in hidden core pain found a release through the act of sharing and my heart opened to receive 3 things:
- Validation: Because every daughter and every story matters.
- Safe Connection: It’s what happens when you realize you don’t have to walk through this alone. There really are others who care and understand.
- Empowerment: To challenge the lies of youth and in doing so, become equipped to give yourself what your mom didn’t –Unconditional love and acceptance.
This is what happens inside both the Emotionally Absent Mothers and Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers class. While each aim to bring understanding to a different dynamic of mother-loss, the real shaker is when you realize that the messages received growing up, you have the power to replace.
What Doesn’t Get Talked About
“Healing is a process that takes time,” I hate this phrase and hear it all the time, but it’s true. What doesn’t get talked about is how if a wound doesn’t heal properly, sometimes that means it needs to be reopened, exposed and the infection drained so that full healing can finally begin. For myself, I found this to be the case in both classes as I worked my way through the various exercises. It’s painful to open up a spot that you don’t want to be touched. It’s equally liberating though, to let go of what doesn’t need to remain. This is part of the journey –the part that takes time, support and encouragement.